I've been meaning to write this blog for a while now but I guess the moment never really struck me. I mean it's not so much that I didn't have time I just...fuck didn't feel like it but I knew I had it in me to write it if only for hte one follower I have out there.
I love women don't get me wrong, but there were times when they straight pissed me off by their actions after the fact. Like once I was really into a nurse named Frances and I thought things were going well. I liked her and I didn't care that she had a kid, was taking care of her nephews and nieces because one was sexually assaulted and other such things. All I saw was that she was a really cool and caring person that I wanted to date. But even if we didn't end up dating I felt that we could have at least been great friends. She was a very cool person and as a nurse she would help me out with anatomy questions I had when I was taking a class in that. Fuck she even picked up my self esteem when I hit a low because I had a thought that maybe I wasn't good enough or such rot. She basically dismissed that as the nonsense it was. So why did she disappear off the face of the earth as if Judge Doom dipped her ass? Questions questions. At one time it haunted me, why the fuck did it happen but I made my peace with it but I wanted to write about this concept and even though it's been a while since all this happen I wanted to jot it out a bit in case people in the future somehow find the answers that they were looking for on my humble blog.
See the thing that bothered me for so long wasn't that she found some douche and fell for him like others she had, but the fact she just left in what seemed like mid sentence. It was like "oh hey josh how are you, listen here's an almost nude pic of me and--" It was just so weird and very sad. . I wondered about why it happened for a long while after. I sent her a few emails and while she read them (I know because I sent them on myspace and has that "date read" thing) she never replied back to me.
I knew she had a squeeze because I found a pic of them together on myspace (that's how I knew he was a douche and it was kind of a a blow to me since I knew I was so much better than him and it's not the first time this has happened. There was another time in my past were I was dating a girl and then we just stopped talking and then a few years later I found a pic of her with some joke a dude. Now, finding the pic of the nurses bf happend first then the other chick, during this time I realized that it wasn't my fault and this had nothing to do with me but rather the way uncool and totally fucked ways these girls were. And it led me to think, just how many people does this happen to.
The bad memories was of being led around when I thought I had finally found someone dash cool to hang out and share forbidden fruit with; but the very bad jokes are different. As noted above this happens to other people too, apparently is too damn tough to sit down with someone over coffee and a cigarette and be all "look I think you're really cool and I loved the time we spent together eating peaches/going to movies/having loads of ass naked sex but I think it's time we went out separate ways." If a girl did that to me I'd respect the shit out of her and while it'd suck that I'd have to find someone new to eat peaches with I would have nothing bad to say about her and the past we had. Just leaving things there and disappearing is like trying to hack off a gangrenous limb with a dull campsite hatchet, while you know it's already dead tissue you're using the most painful thing. Rather it should be like a guillotine event...one swoop and it's done! A lot of people can benefit from this sage advice. I daresay it's the society we live i and the ideals that run wild making people (usually girls) think it's ok to just leave things hanging rather than dole out some unvarnished truth. It's pointless that people don't do this and then get upset when someone won't sugarcoat their shit for them. And that in my book is a very bad joke.
I know in a society that lacks certain manners and grace it's a tough sell but this small little instances of giving a little of a shit and shows you respect the other person is what's needed. There are days dedicated to not eating meat and days for punching and emo kid out. Why not have a day when you told someone the real truth about how much they spoil your lifehood and how you want to go your separate ways? or at least how to fix them. I'm sure a lot less people would end up killing themselves or go on a murder rampage ifthere was a time set aside for this sort of thing. Only after all this has been done will it then no longer be such a bad joke.
J
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